So, by now – you know what’s this post is all about, what will be the writing style and some of you probably consider it as NSFW! Well I dont care about that – all I care is that my eyes are burning and I am turning into a retard, I am fucking annoyed and I have been under irritating mental pressure because of those fucking text based CAPTCHAS where I have to spend couple of extremely annoying minutes to look at those gibberish texts , understand that and then input what I am seeing on the screen! Oh yeah baby, It feels like I am sitting for a VIRGINITY TEST inside one of those bloody fucking Egyptian prisons. I AM A HUMAN AND I CERTAINLY DONT WANT TO BE TORTURED TO PROVE THAT! If you are still in favor of those CRAPPY FUCKING text based CAPTCHAS, you can leave the rest of the post because I dont give a damn about your love for those eye-tearing, getting-on-the-nerve style alien things.

Well, if you really have to FUCKING test me as a HUMAN, DONT DO THAT by slicing my ribs apart to check if there is any heart. There are certainly many other ways to check if your visitors are human or bot. Record their mouse movement (and put it into a pattern), or check if mouse was really over the submit button or blah blah blah. AND IF YOU WANT A FULLPROOF military grade PREVENTION against BOTS, go fuck with your document under a 200000ft dungeon.

Alright, the reason I am writing this article is that CAPTCHAs don’t have to be so fucking annoying. You can make intuitive captcha images instead of asking your visitors to translate what the hell your great great grandfather had seen in his UFO dreams, printed in those images.

WHY not make it something like these ones, keeping the actual captcha validation flow intact. Dont change it’s working style. Keep the same style of of public private key, salts, user inputs and everything. JUST FOR GODS SAKE change those images. Ask something different. Why not you think about something like these three below – if you ask yoru users to fill in the blanks (in the input box – instead of the mind fucking gibberish and garbled craps)

ANS: liberty OR LIBERY or LiBeRtY (whatever caps)

ANS: tree

ANS: rectangle or rectangles (consider fail safe or singular/plural for more user friendliness)

Seriously, why on EARTH do I have to prove that I am a HOMO-SAPIENS by filling up these freaking awful garbled text based CAPTCHAs. Lets make it easy, unless you are planning to serve your $100000000000 secret sausage recipe thinking that an annoying old school CAPTCHA will prevent it from being stolen. Please for gods sake, help making these moments your visitors will spend on your site a little more pleasing.

If no one starts this project, I will seriously start it as a web service with a name “NFC”. You know what that means? NO – FUCKING – CAPTCHA!

Arrrrrggggghhh!!